You may have noticed that I haven't written in a while. Between starting our yoga co-op at Vitalize Community and Healing Arts Studio, keeping up with my day job at the bank and simply trying to get through the daily hullabaloo that is life, I haven't had a chance lately to compose my thoughts. But I've certainly been thinking a LOT.
No one warns you when you start a yoga business that the business of yoga is not strictly yogic. My partners and I wandered into the process all starry-eyed and hopeful. Little did we know that we might soon find ourselves reeling from the stress brought on by legalities, working in harmony with others and worrying about financial viability. I kept saying to my partners, "I JUST want to teach yoga. How hard is that?"
But even to "just teach," is not always easy either. Some days I find myself in a rush to get to my Wednesday night class after working all day in the office, and arrive flustered. Other days I find myself slightly dreading getting up so early to teach yoga at 6am. Is it all worth it?
The answer is in the outcome. I always feel 100% better as soon as I start teaching. And that's the point of it all, really--to feel like I'm doing what I'm meant to do, and to nurturing others' growth in the process.
But being a yoga practitioner and teacher does not mean that I know everything there is to know about yoga--the truth is I've barely scratched the surface. I do know a little, and I share what I do know. I am excited when I don't know the answer to a student's question--it means I have more to explore.
So, in that light, I have been continuing my education over the past several months. I've been diving into the study of the body and movement (anatomy and kinesiology), reading books on Ayurveda and attending workshops on yoga whenever I can. I even find myself using skills learned elsewhere useful in my yoga practice. For example, I was sent to a technical writing workshop this month for my banking job, which has helped me better organize my thoughts off and on the mat.
I am trying to recognize the sanskaras (mental imprints) that might be holding me back from being my greatest self. I am LOVING the exploration of yoga nidra, the art of "yogic sleep," which I started teaching in mid-February. I am reaching out to new members of the yoga and yoga teaching community, and I am attempting to step back and be real with myself before making any new commitments. There is a lot on my plate right now, and it's going to take a while to digest.
At the same time, I am looking to the horizon, so excited for what may come, and trying to savor each day. Thanks to all who have share your love and support of my dreams and endeavors. I hope to see you in a yoga class very soon!